Gay on Fraternity Row

What is it like to be gay and Greek? Are fraternities safe places for gay brothers? What kind of environment do fraternity houses provide homosexual members? The first-hand accounts of 30 gay men in the book OUT ON FRATERNITY ROW (Alyson Books), provide answers to those questions.

Written with candor and honesty, each tale in this anthology gives a glimpse of the Greeks' most invisible minority. The individuals telling their stories are diverse in background, age, fraternity and geographic location. Each goes through phases of coming out, some quickly, some not at all. However, even with these differences, certain themes are common. Gay men become Greek for the same reasons as heterosexual men--for the brotherhood and companions fraternities provide.

But once in the fraternity, many writers tell how they felt isolated and alone, unable to tell their secret. The prevailing homophobic atmosphere--conveyed through gay jokes--kept many men locked in closets. Some writers hoped fraternities would teach them not to be gay.

Many of the stories told of men's excessive use of alcohol to drown gay feelings. Fraternity men, both gay and straight, would objectify women as 'cover' to prove they weren't gay. A large portion of the men who came out after college tell of distancing themselves from brothers after graduation. Many felt disconnected from the former brothers, or other brothers distanced themselves from the out member. But not everyone had a negative experience being gay and Greek. Indeed, several stories show that when a brother is up-front about his homosexuality the brotherhood remains strong.

In chapters with solid camaraderie and mutual respect, coming out was not a negative experience. One wrote, 'My brothers' unconditional acceptance and support helped me move from being afraid of my brothers to being at peace with their companionship.' As I read this book I kept thinking, these are my students talking to me. They are telling me what they feel. And as I read, I kept asking, how can I make it better for them? Thankfully, OUT ON FRATERNITY ROW offers interventions and educational tools to combat homophobia.